March 03, 2012


I am going to end up fat.

I cannot stop eating. I try SO hard but I always managed to screw it up. Today it was frozen yogurt, cake, and chips. Yesterday it was just chips. It's always something. I hate myself and my lack of willpower. I don't even know what to do anymore. How do I stop????? I feel so hopeless.

I have an appointment Wednesday with my therapist. I don't know if it's even worth going. I've only gotten worse since I started seeing her. Her suggestions aren't helping. Is there even a point to continuing?

I think I'm going to start tracking again. Thinking about food obsessively and a calorie counting is better than ending up morbidly obese and hating my body. Better than hating myself.

1 comment:

  1. I've written those words so many times, thought "Well I'm even more unhappy now and now I might be putting on weight.May as well go back.
    But I assure you, if you keep going, keep fighting, the binges will lessen.
    You CAN do this.
    Thank you so much for all the lovely comments! I'm going to the sports store today to take your advice and get a yoga top :)